The Right Decision?

Transient

You asked me if you were making the right decision, abrupt as it may have appeared to the ones around you, but it wasn't so abrupt for you, was it? There's always a build up to the crescendo.

Is it the right decision, though? Is choosing this door "better" than choosing another door? You know, I used to think that we could learn a lot more from the wisdom and experience of others, but I think I'm beginning to see that those external suggestions can help navigate the storm, but they can't stop you from having to go through it.

These storms, these crazy, ship-wrecking storms, they aren't always bad. Sometimes they're worse. Sometimes they don't make your resolve and heart stronger, rather they just make you harder; more emotionally numb. What's that line Jeff Buckley sang?

Maybe there's a God above
All I've ever learned from love
Was how to shoot somebody who outdrew you
And it's not a cry that you hear at night
It's not somebody who's seen the light
It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah (1)

I think when you get older you'll see the storm is always taking you to see the end of yourself; to see the reality that even on this tiny, wet rock floating through space, there are billions of people and you are just one - just one - of them.

One thing I have learned, my "suggestion" for you, is that when you are anxious, uncertain, emotionally aching, understand that it's not over yet. This storm? Well, it's a mini-storm, and it will pass. Worse things are yet to come. So enjoy this storm, and those gullible friends who are riding it out with you. You'll go through a million storms by the time your life comes to a close - but you'll have very few gullible friends who will still be riding it out with you.

  1. Jeff Buckley, Grace; track 6, Hallelujah
Posted on May 20, 2012 and filed under Moments, Letter.